Wednesday, August 08, 2007

Back On!

Well, we finally got the internet connected in the rental house, and now I feel human again. I was feeling so disconnected from the world, especially since we had no TV to even watch the news. I've so missed my blogging family and friends.

A little has happened since I last wrote. I'm now a year older (31!) and had a wonderful time at Red Bone Alley w/Will (sans Ella-thank God for grandparents!). We both had shrimp and cheese grits (yummy!!!) and a free birthday sundae for dessert. (And yes, Sarah, I got to enjoy my cup of coffee!) There was a musician playing the guitar there-blues and some 80's classics-it was lovely. I really wanted to dance but neither Will nor I had the nerve as no one else was....maybe I can talk him into a dance class and we'll show off next year. :-)

And more news...we close on the 20th! So, we'll be closing 35 days after we put the house up for sale. Crazy how fast this all came together. I'm now trying to remind myself that I should be thankful and grateful. Right now, I'm going through an emotional time. We're losing our first home, the only home Ella has known. And we've gotten about 6 calls since the house was under contract which makes me think, "Did we have it priced too low?" "Could we have gotten more?" "Should we have held out?" Based on our interview w/the real estate agent we considered going with (but decided against), we made $1000 more than she would have even listed the house for, yet still, that was only one realtor's opinion and again I wonder....You know, Satan loves to get me w/those "What If's."

So, I've just been a wreck this week. Questioning, crying, missing our home, and to top it all off, I was 5 days late. That actually got me hoping, wondering....but after 2 tests, I resigned myself to the fact that I was not pregnant. Nope, just very late and I'm never late. Of course now I realize stress and Ella nursing at night during those weeks she slept w/us at Mama's probably led to the delay. But I was hoping...

I know God's timing is best, and I know that I need to make this home our home for now, as best I can. I know all these things in my head, but if my heart could ever get on board, I'd be doing much better.

Thank you all for your prayers.


Elizabeth said...

My sweet Laura,
What an emotional time! I felt the same way about our first home, and no, you didn't price it too low: just right because it sold in a terrible market. Don't worry about that, please!
I've taken to buying pregnancy tests in bulk so I can take them more frequently... maybe we can share.
So glad you had a good birthday and I hear how much Aunt Emily loves keeping Ella.
Well, I love you! Feel your pain, praying for you as always. I've so missed you blogging: glad you're back!

rcsnickers said...

Oh Laura, I too am sorry to hear about the emotional time you are having... esp being late and stress! Glad your house sold quickly. I know with your creativity and love for your family you will make that rental house look like a mansion!

Happy birthday too! 31 has been good to me.

Praying for you,

Oh be careful with those cheap pregnancy test strips you can buy online. They give a lot of false positives! They show a very faint line when not pregnant. Just warning you and Elizabeth. We have bought some and had disappointments with them.

Emily said...

I'm sorry you're having a hard time. It is always hard to move, especially from a house where you have so many memories and firsts. I agree with Letisha, I know you will have the rental house fixed up cute in no time!
I am glad you got to get away for dinner, just you and Willie. Please don't feel like you're getting old! You look great chickie, healthy and young. Remember Mom Kannon started her family at 34. :)

Erin said...

Aw Laura, so sorry things have been so stressful for you. But Praise God about your house... so fast for you!

And you'll get pregnant again at the right time. =)

Happy 31st!

Nene said...

I just want to let you know that I'll keep praying! "What if's" can really take over our thoughts! God knows what's best for us even when we don't. :)

Happy belated birthday! My favorite at Red Bone Alley is shrimp and grits, too! I'm so glad you enjoyed your day!

Laura said...

Liz-I know, they do get quite expensive, huh? I finally realized I didn't have to get the ones that say "Pregnant" or "Not pregnant." After using that kind when I found out about Ella, I've been hooked, but they are much more expensive. So, now I'm back to + or -. And I like it better; actually seeing the words "Not pregnant" every time made me feel even more horrible. Somehow a minus sign isn't quite as demeaning.

Letisha-don't worry-no internet tests for me. :-)

Elise said...

It is such an emotional time. I have said a prayer for you, and will continue...
And Happy birthday!!! You are a lovely 31! :)