So Relieved!

I am thanking God again and again because I was finally able to hear from my midwife this evening. I emailed her 2 weeks ago and then called her and left a message w/her receptionist last week but still heard nothing. I started rereading over my email-did I say something to offend her or was she just extremely busy? Thankfully it was the latter. She's delivered 10 babies in 2 weeks, so needless to say she's been sleep-deprived and way behind on emails and calls. She put my mind at ease re: the whole crazy weight gain/bloating thing. She said she's had lots of moms to call in w/their 2nd pregnancy saying, "I must be having twins; I'm huge already." But she said that just happens to some people w/their 2nd (or 3rd)-and it's usually not twins. Also, she said w/my temps being lower at the beg. of January, I'm probably not further along. And the best news of all-she said she'd try to see me the Sat. we're up that way for my 10 year college reunion (I'm getting old!) I'm ever so glad; I'll be one day shy of 12 weeks then and am hoping we'll hear a heartbeat!

We talked a little bit about the logistics of having her as my midwife again-it is almost a 3 hour drive but she said she'd be willing to see us on Fridays (she's off on Fridays) since that is when Will could get off work early to drive me there. (I really don't like driving "long" distances by myself. I know to some of you-like Letisha-3 hours is like 30 minutes, but for me, it's long.) Obviously if I choose to go w/her, I'll have to leave at my first contraction to make sure I make it in time. With Ella I got there at 8 cm. dilated (but only had to drive 30 min. that time.) Which reminds me...I need to post Ella's birth story soon.

I plan on going w/Kimberly to see her midwife this week or next. (No, Kimberly's not pregnant; she just wants to visit her and let her see how much Jonathan has grown.) Amy recommends her too-it's just hard to switch when you so like your current midwife. And I guess my story's a little strange-most people don't bond that much with their midwife/doctor but Amy's been so much more. She runs a birthing and family wellness center so she saw Ella for well baby visits up until we moved. Any time I had questions (like the time I thought Ella had swallowed one of my B-complex vitamins), I could beep her day or night and she'd call me right back. Then there was this time that I was so thankful I had Amy. So, you see, she's more than just my midwife, she's a dear family friend. As of now, she doesn't think she could do a homebirth for me (which is what I really want) b/c she no longer has Dr. Artis's help. (She was needed back at the hospital; they had a shortage.) Perhaps she'll have help again by October and then she may be able to do it. Otherwise it would be at a birthing center again. Which is not bad at all, just not my home. Lisa, Kimberly's midwife, may be willing to do a homebirth, so I'll ask her about that. She just opened up this birthing center though, so she's moving away from homebirths.

So, all this to say, I'd appreciate your prayers as we try to make a decision in the next few weeks. Thank you all for your encouragement.

We Have Eggs!

How delighted we were to find 3 eggs in the chicken house today! Penny is now offically laying again. These first eggs were more oblong than round-interesting. Hopefully she'll be making lots more soon. (Peepers doesn't seem to lay eggs; the previous owners said she laid only one egg one time.)

I Spoke Too Soon

Remember how I said my bloating was better? Well, that lasted for about a day. It never completely went away, but I had some relief. Now I'm back to using a rubberband just so I can wear my jeans. I've even worn maternity pants out in public twice. Yes, you read that right. I simply CANNOT fit into my clothes anymore. And in case you need reminding, I'm only 6.5 weeks along.

I found some forums online where women have said things like, "Help me-I'm 6 weeks and look like 6 months!" Other women commented-"Been there before-it's okay-it will either a.) go away in a few weeks or b.) at least not get much worse. " One woman said she looked like 6 months around 9 weeks along but that when she truly was 6 months, she wasn't much bigger. Well, that's a relief. If my stomach keeps growing at this rate, I truly will pop by the time 6 months rolls around.

And lest you think I'm exaggerating, here's proof.

I'm not doing a lot of rejoicing over here-I stepped on the scale to find I'd already gained 4 lbs. Of what? My little lentil bean doesn't even weigh an ounce yet. Am I retaining water (even though I'm peeing quite frequently?) is it just gas (even though...okay you get the point). And no, I am not overindulging myself in sweets, etc. So, for now, I wait. Since I know there have been others to go through this (even though I don't know any personally), I'm not panicked, just a little bit upset.

I had the perfect pregnancy w/Ella-and was SOOOO looking forward to the actual pregnancy part again (the baby afterwards, of course, but some women really hate the pregnancy part-I loved it.) But I'm not enjoying this one. And I don't feel connected yet to this baby. Part of it may be my heart not letting me get connected until I know everything's okay.

And it's hard to enjoy the pregnancy when you just feel so fatandyucky. I'm okay feeling that way at 8 months, not now. And let me just add-if I was truly 4 months along and this was truly the baby showing on me, I'd be delighted and happily wearing my maternity clothes. But, alas, I can't even say I'm in my 3rd month yet. (And, by the way, I can't wait until I am officially 9 weeks, so I can say, "I'm in my 3rd month" if anyone asks. I figure I'll leave fewer mouths agape if I say that than if I say, "I'm only 9 weeks-isn't my growing tummy just beautiful?")

And lest you fear, I am still grateful for what I think is a baby growing inside me. My mom recently asked, "Laura, what if it's a tumor?" Thanks, Mom, I needed to add that to my list of worries. But no, I've taken 2 pregnancy tests and still haven't started my period-pretty sure it's a baby. Some ladies that I spoke with at MOPS yesterday said, "That's just how it is w/your 2nd-you show much more quickly." And technically this is my 3rd-but still w/Ella, I didn't need maternity clothes until 14 weeks. That's actually early for some to wear them, but I attribute that to the fact that one, I am short and my tummy has no where to go but out and two, I had indeed been pregnant before, and even though it didn't last, my uterus still knew what it meant to expand.

Here's the clincher though-if I go from wearing maternity clothes at 14 weeks w/Ella to 6 weeks with this one, then if I ever get pregnant again, I will have to start wearing them two weeks before the baby is conceived. Just thought I'd give you a heads-up.

So, my current plan is to go buy lots of cute (do those exist?) sweatpants and long shirts and wear them everywhere (not sure what to do about church attire yet). I figure if I curl my hair and make it look ever so pretty, maybe no one will notice my tummy and ask the dreaded question, "So, when are you due, dear?"

Favorite Dessert

Okay, right now (at this exact moment), I'm not craving this dessert. Anything chocolate, yes. Tomorrow, however, I may have to make a trip into town for the necessary ingredients. If you enjoy banana pudding, I think you'll like this even more. It takes a little longer than the 15 min. prep time the recipe states (I don't know about you, but it takes me that long just to find and get everything out of my pantry and fridge!) but it's totally worth it! And a heads-up, the cream cheese needs to be softened and the whipped topping thawed-I always forget that part. The picture is from the magazine (Kraft Foods) where I got this recipe. It's free to subscribe.


Banana Split Cake
Prep: 15 min (or if you're like me, 45 min.)
Refrigerating time: 5 hours
Total time: Plan on 6 hours

Ingredients

• 1 1/2 cups graham cracker crumbs (I personally think that buying the crackers and then crushing them w/a rolling pin-or allowing Ella too-is much more fun and tastes bettter than buying the ready-made crumbs in the box)


• 1 1/4 cups sugar, divided


• 1/2 cup (1 stick) butter, melted


• 2 pkg. (8 oz. each) cream cheese, softened (neufchatel cheese, which has 1/3 less fat than regular cream cheese, works great, too.)


• 1 can (20 oz) crushed pineapple, drained


• 6 medium bananas, divided


• 2 cups milk (I'm pretty sure I usually use skim milk-I'm telling you even if you make this as "healthy" for you as possible, it will still taste delicious!)


• 2 pkg. (4-serving size each) vanilla flavor instant pudding & pie filling (fat-free, sugar-free kind if you like)


• 2 cups thawed whipped topping, divided


• 1 cup chopped pecans
  

Directions

Mix crumbs, 1/4 cup sugar and 1/4 cup butter; press onto bottom of 13x9 pan. Freeze for 10 min.

Beat cream cheese and remaining 1 cup sugar in bowl w/electric mixer until well blended. Carefuly spread cream cheese mixture over crust; top w/pineapple. Slice 4 of the bannas; arrange over pineapple.

Pour milk into large bowl. Add dry pudding mixes. Beat w/wire whisk for 2 min. or until well blended. Stir in 1 cup whipped topping; spread over banana layer in pan. Top w/remaining whipped topping. Lastly, sprinkle w/pecans.

Refrigerate 5 hours. Just before serving, slice remaining bananas; arrange over dessert. Makes approximately 24 servings. YUMMY!

Feeling Normal Again

Monday and Tuesday I felt like I was carrying around four or five bricks in my stomach-no joke. I felt 9 months pregnant (looked at least 3) and had gas, belching, indigestion, cramping. Ugghh-it was awful. I was worried at first (b/c of the cramping-sometimes it really hurt, most of the times, a dull ache-but never on just one side) but I didn't have any spotting at all. I'm only 5.5 weeks and it's questionable if a heartbeat would be detected on an ultrasound right now, so I thought it pointless to go to a new doc. Instead I opted to pray w/my hubby, rest (as much as is possible w/an active 2 year old), and forgo my exercise for a couple days.

"Chase me, Mommy." Jog? Are you kidding? I couldn't even walk at a normal rate. I was holding my tummy like a lady ready to go in labor. Not so much b/c of pain but b/c of the pressure and ever.so.full.feeling. But praise the Lord, this morning, I woke up and felt immensely better (only 1-2 bricks now). And I SOOOO enjoyed my lunch today (baked potato w/cheese, butter, sour cream, bacon crumbles, and taco meat [venison, of course]). That last part may sound weird, but that MADE the potato, let me tell you. :-) And I even worked out-still can't jog yet, just a nice walk, not even that brisk, but enough for now.

I was encouraged by Elise's comment when I checked my blog yesterday-to be thankful for every pregnancy symptom-my problem was I had none of these feelings w/Ella (at least not all at the same time), so it got me worried. I've heard every pregnancy is different-now I know.

So, I'm more hopeful that everything's okay. I'm considering scheduling an ultrasound around 8 weeks to hear the heartbeat, Lord willing, but that will mean a new doctor (and telling? the doctor, "No I really don't plan on using you, I just want this ultrasound for my peace of mind.") Not sure that will go over well. Not to mention everything's out of pocket this time (have health insurance but no maternity coverage). Then there's the question of should I have an ultrasound when it's not medically necessary? I did w/Ella-twice (1st time to put my mind at ease at 8 wks, 2nd time to find out the sex around 20 weeks)-but am now rethinking the subject. Sooo.....still not sure about that 8 week ultrasound. I might just have to be patient and wait until the midwife I choose (please pray for wisdom) can detect the heartbeat w/her doppler at around 12 weeks.


By the way, our baby's name, while in utero, is Icee. Do you like it? Ella thought of it all by herself. And "his" EDD is Oct. 6. This morning Ella kissed my tummy and said, "Feel better, Icee. Get prize. Milk prize."
Then to me, "Icee pops out, gets milk prize. First this side, then that side." :-)

Hopefully soon, I'll get around to posting some recipes, since Liz and Emily have done their fair share for awhile.

I'll probably post a dessert first....
:-)